There is almost nothing outside you that will help in any kind of lasting way, unless you are waiting for a donor organ
You can’t buy, achieve, or date serenity. Peace of mind is an inside job, unrelated to fame, fortune, or whether your partner loves you. Horribly, what that means is that it is also an inside job for the few people you love most desperately in the world. We cannot arrange lasting safety or happiness for our most beloved people. They have to find their own ways, their own answers.
Not one single person in history has gotten an alcoholic sober. (Maybe you’ll be the first. But — and I say this with love — I doubt it.) If it is someone else’s problem, you probably don’t have the solution.Anne Lamott, from “Almost Everything – Notes on Hope” P. 35